Yes, it is spring. But it does not feel like the season of fresh flowers and sunlight. It is a season of death and illness coupled with lots of April rain. But it is also about perspective. It has to be. And grace.
Grace is a lesson that I have had to learn and re-learn many times. Not the grace of a ballerina because I certainly don’t have that. But rather the kind of grace that you give others and yourself when things are not perfect. The kind of grace that is patient. Patience with myself and my progress.
It has already been six weeks since my last hip surgery. And I say "already" as it seems like such a long time ago, but on the other hand, it is “just” six weeks and I guess I’m still on the early side of healing. With that being said, I have been patient and have exercised grace towards myself. I have been present with my recovery for the most part. Yes, I’ve been itching to move forward, but at the same time I have listened and followed directions as I know that the grace I give myself now will pay dividends for my future hip health.
I was given permission to do planks by my Hip Healing Surgeon and, of course, I pushed it a little with my PT. “Well, if I can do a plank, I need to be able to stand up so can’t I just do a downward dog from plank?” PT looked at me amusingly and hesitantly (I think) said, “sure”.
This morning was the time to try it out. I stepped out on my patio with the rising light of day and the sing song of rain hitting the grass. The sound of my mat unrolling was music to my ears. I started my yoga flow with my arms overhead looking up towards the sky and then brought my hands slowly and, with presence, to heart center, walked myself out into a plank, chaturanga down, upward dog and then step up to standing. I did this as the rain sang its melody of grace to me today. I felt awkward, stiff, weak, but full of grace!
And, again, looping back to that perspective – I am healing, hopeful and humbled. I am full of grace. Who cares if I’m a little stiff and lacking that physical grace in my yoga flow right now. I did it and I'm completely grace filled. Give yourself some grace and, perhaps, in spite of the illness around us, you can smell those beautiful flowers that are really being bathed by the sunlight of spring! Breathe in this season of grace. Pause and be present with a perspective of hope.